[There's far too much for Ray to think on and probably a lot he shouldn't think about at all. Most of which, he briefly thinks, would be much better left until he's sober and not full of far too many endorphins that are making his thought process little more than an excited hum of ideas. This is good. This is great. But what comes up must come down and maybe, just maybe, Fraser might change his mind when he gets in there with 'normal' people and friends that aren't Kowalski.
Maybe.
But Fraser's grabbing at his wrist again and Ray doesn't fight it, looking towards his partner with a hopeful sort of curiosity, because God he's going to need so much reassurance before he believes that this is reality.
Benton's words are reassurances though. Talk of need and partners and wanting Ray by his side are exactly what he needed to hear, and it's odd just how much of it he's suddenly relating to. Miss you every second of the day, and dream of you at night; it was as if Fraser could read minds right now, because Ray had the same damn feelings of emptiness whenever he dropped Fraser off at the consulate or they finished work for the night. Ray looked forward to every single day that he could spend with Benton, thought of him when he wasn't around, dreamt of him overnight and just generally couldn't get the Mountie out of his head.
And yet as Fraser slipped his hand into Ray's and continued, Ray hesitated, his attention flickering down at the clasped hands, curling his fingers in against the warmth of Fraser's as if he doesn't want to let go despite his uncertainty.]
Fraser. That. That uh. I don't wanna stand alone either. I mean, you and me, we should be together, I get that. We work. And that- whatever that was- was top notch, mind blowin' stuff. But uh, we walk in there holdin' hands and uh. I know a lot of people in there, Fraser.
[He's not even sure what his own problem is. It's not like he tends to concern himself with what people think of him. Ray's had a lifetime of not giving a shit. He'd even said he didn't care what they'd think of the two dancing together, but hand holding and fond gazes. That's.... undeniably something.]
no subject
Maybe.
But Fraser's grabbing at his wrist again and Ray doesn't fight it, looking towards his partner with a hopeful sort of curiosity, because God he's going to need so much reassurance before he believes that this is reality.
Benton's words are reassurances though. Talk of need and partners and wanting Ray by his side are exactly what he needed to hear, and it's odd just how much of it he's suddenly relating to. Miss you every second of the day, and dream of you at night; it was as if Fraser could read minds right now, because Ray had the same damn feelings of emptiness whenever he dropped Fraser off at the consulate or they finished work for the night. Ray looked forward to every single day that he could spend with Benton, thought of him when he wasn't around, dreamt of him overnight and just generally couldn't get the Mountie out of his head.
And yet as Fraser slipped his hand into Ray's and continued, Ray hesitated, his attention flickering down at the clasped hands, curling his fingers in against the warmth of Fraser's as if he doesn't want to let go despite his uncertainty.]
Fraser. That. That uh. I don't wanna stand alone either. I mean, you and me, we should be together, I get that. We work. And that- whatever that was- was top notch, mind blowin' stuff. But uh, we walk in there holdin' hands and uh. I know a lot of people in there, Fraser.
[He's not even sure what his own problem is. It's not like he tends to concern himself with what people think of him. Ray's had a lifetime of not giving a shit. He'd even said he didn't care what they'd think of the two dancing together, but hand holding and fond gazes. That's.... undeniably something.]