[ Fraser had been looking forward to his trip to Canada. It was his chance to get away from it all, go back to nature, and after everything that happened it seemed to him that both Ray and himself needed the time apart. Ray deserved the break more than anyone--after the years he'd dedicated to fighting crime, it should surprise no one if he was overdue for a paid year off by now.
But that wasn't the way police work went. Ray got a short vacation, and then they were back to being ground to the bone. Fraser's vacation terms were better--he had a lot more freedom, and days built up that he hadn't taken besides, and it wasn't really...a holiday. He was still working every day that he could. He took the time, for Ray, but missed him every single second.
He hadn't expected to come back and find Ray missing, replaced. But that...that was a problem. Fraser needed Ray too. They depended on each other more than just in the field, not that it was just about the sex either. They cared about each other, trusted each other all the way into the bedroom, and when Ray had begun to learn to put his life into Fraser's hands there, it had spiraled out into their work. It had helped Fraser find his balance too, and a reason to stay, a heady romance and passionate physicality that he hadn't ever experienced before.
That was all gone. This new Ray didn't have that kind of relationship with him, didn't even know he could, and it had left a chasm. What would he do if Ray never came back? Did he even realize how much Fraser missed him?
But the new guy wasn't really so bad. Fraser had warmed to him, seen into his personal life, had his life saved by him. He was worthy enough--and attractive. Very attractive, obviously.
Not that that was good reasoning to break into the guy's home on a Friday night, sans Diefenbaker, dressed in an uncharacteristic black shirt and jeans - after the day they'd had, after Stella and the bombs and being subjected to the proverbial cold shoulder - and sit waiting in the dark for Ray Kowalski to make his way home. ]
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But that wasn't the way police work went. Ray got a short vacation, and then they were back to being ground to the bone. Fraser's vacation terms were better--he had a lot more freedom, and days built up that he hadn't taken besides, and it wasn't really...a holiday. He was still working every day that he could. He took the time, for Ray, but missed him every single second.
He hadn't expected to come back and find Ray missing, replaced. But that...that was a problem. Fraser needed Ray too. They depended on each other more than just in the field, not that it was just about the sex either. They cared about each other, trusted each other all the way into the bedroom, and when Ray had begun to learn to put his life into Fraser's hands there, it had spiraled out into their work. It had helped Fraser find his balance too, and a reason to stay, a heady romance and passionate physicality that he hadn't ever experienced before.
That was all gone. This new Ray didn't have that kind of relationship with him, didn't even know he could, and it had left a chasm. What would he do if Ray never came back? Did he even realize how much Fraser missed him?
But the new guy wasn't really so bad. Fraser had warmed to him, seen into his personal life, had his life saved by him. He was worthy enough--and attractive. Very attractive, obviously.
Not that that was good reasoning to break into the guy's home on a Friday night, sans Diefenbaker, dressed in an uncharacteristic black shirt and jeans - after the day they'd had, after Stella and the bombs and being subjected to the proverbial cold shoulder - and sit waiting in the dark for Ray Kowalski to make his way home. ]